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The Garden At Dusk

by Frederick Julius

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1.
Why won't you tell me the things I need to know? There's something hidden down below. Some things are just too obscene like a whispered secret 'neath an evergreen. It's hard for a hardened man to come completely clean. I think you know.
2.
You've got a lovely garden. It must have taken you a while to grow it -- tall and handsome and held for ransom whenever I come around. It's picturesque, that's for certain. But as you draw the curtain closed I'm hurtin.' Well, I've got my wild side, too, you know. So vintage and classic I have to stop and cough up my last breath because as opportunity passes by I drink in the want of her violet eyes. You know something that I don't or can't or won't or shouldn't even try to discern. When will my distant and proud heart learn? I'm older by 4 years. I'm older by 4 years than you. I'm older by 4 years. I'm older by 4 years, it's true. I'm older by 4 years. There's a restaurant you've never been to, so there's a chance we could meet on a Monday; sip soda and slip out the back door watching over shoulders for anybody who could get word back to you that there's too much for us to do that we might just have to jump and break through that wall 'round your lovely garden. I'm older by 4 years. I'm older by 4 years than you. I'm older by 4 years. I'm older by 4 years, it's true. I'm older by 4 years.
3.
A Snowy Day 00:31
Ooh! A snowy day!
4.
Lately, I've been sleeping in the afternoon. Throw all my cares away and close my eyes, there won't be another day like this one feels inside. Lately, I've been sleeping in the afternoon.
5.
Oooh. Ah-ha-ha. Ah-ha-ha. Ah-ha-ha. When they sing like that it goes oooh. Ah-ha-ha. Ah-ha-ha. Ah-ha-ha.
6.
In a fit of jealous rage he shouted "Mary, you can't take the low road no more!" There were several instances where he doubted and as she drove them off of the road he swore "I will never, ever, ever, never, ever do this again." It was a wide trip by Trafalgar the reverberations of which still ring. It was a wide trip by the edge of a place where they might have fixed up the whole thing. As the carburetor flew down the hillside they got so tangled up between the doors that they cried. There were several instances where they killed light and as they both divorced the road it replied "I will never, ever, ever, never, ever do this again." It was a wide trip by Trafalgar the reverberations of which still ring. It was a wide trip by the edge of a place where they might have fixed up the whole thing. Lay low, lay low crash, crash, crash, crash They're lying dead in the grass. Lay low, lay low crash, crash, crash, crash A million cracks in the glass. When the minister said, "Dearly departed ..." a garden blossomed in an evergreen room. There were several inclinations retarded and as they shoveled dirt into a mud bath he crooned "I will never, ever, ever, never, ever do this again." It was a wide trip by Trafalgar the reverberations of which still ring. It was a wide trip by the edge of a place where they might have fixed up the whole thing.
7.
I had dreams of being rock and roll on a stage of ageless time. But what a young man's game is rock and roll when you've got a face like mine. I've sipped my sadness slowly and long because it's my life that I've been pouring.
8.
Evangeline 03:20
Evangeline, you walk in wonder dancing softly. Evangeline, I wonder, too, if Evangeline has put a magic blanket on me. But Evangeline, what can I do? Twinkles and sparkles conceal your tired eyes. Your heart has been sleeping so long. But it doesn't have to be a long goodbye when your life is a song. Evangeline, the wicked winter's melting slowly. Evangeline, the sky is wide. Evangeline, you'll take a trip where I can't follow but Evangeline, you know I've tried. A season of laughter pales in comparison to the portent of what could be. But it looks like we missed our train again. I couldn't see it. Evangeline, the circles we've been walking 'round in you've had enough, I know it's true. But Evangeline, I've gone as far as the door is open and Evangeline, that's all I can do.
9.
We're Alive 00:57
There's a story the children know and it never ends. No matter how old they seem to grow their worship stays pretend. We're alive! The stars in our eyes are corsets. Ah, they way they rise! Could they really be real?
10.
This Package 02:21
Take me down a notch and take me further still. They wonder if you'll hurt me bad. I say I know you will. Can it be the truth that there is nothing left between the two old friends who cannot bear to say a thing they mean? Bring me down a bit and bring me down some more. I wonder if I'll let you lie enough to let me score. Can it be the truth that there is nothing left that's clean enough for us to want to stay and linger in-between? Take this package. Don't you dare unwrap it. Early is as lately does, so please just take it. Please just take your baggage. Don't you dare unstrap it now. Lately I just feel that earlier I would have carried it. Let me down a ways and leave me down below. You wonder if I've seen enough to let you know I know. Can it be the truth that there is nothing left that means as much for us as all the nightmares both of us have dreamed? Take this package. Don't you dare unwrap it. Early is as lately does, so please just take it. Please just take your baggage. Don't you dare unstrap it now. Lately I just feel that earlier I would have carried it.
11.
12.
This is a song for Edison. My fierce independence, my obstinate grinding and all of my sad devotionals, bookended days never intertwining with brothers and sisters. I had a multitude gathered. But I would have rather walked on alone. No poet could pen you. No sculptor could cast you from the clay of the earth. You know that you've been immaculate -- coddled and cleansed since the day of your birth. There's magic in starting. I'm never departing without you. I won't forget about you or leave you alone. Your eyes are my lifeblood. Your smile is a circus. And your laughter peals across fields of the dead and make naysayers nervous because they can't catch you. I'll bet you they can't handle heaven. That's why they're trembling as you spin and sing. You're so strong and smart now, with the soul of a soldier. You lead me on wonderful magical marches and I never get older with you in the picture. I'm pretty sure I am in love with you, high up above with you helping me fly. Ride on my shoulders and play with my chin 'til the sun goes to bed. Laugh 'til you cry and fall down on me hard and I'll cradle your head. I used to dream this. When I was a boy I could see you. I wish I could be you and just you alone.
13.
Nothing sacred on the temple grounds can be traded for your soul. And rumbles satirize your promises with drinks that they won't let you hold. Let's take a knee. Shall we follow a path more ordinary? A less naked tree would turn to ash in a digital mortuary. Seething, you see them. Running poor to a harvest, charging hard. Be, then. You believe them. Corroded lenses. A farmer's daughter.
14.
What if I told you that I was not lying? And what if I told you that what I told you was a lie? And what if I was lying on my side while I was trying to convince you that I was never really lying on my side? It's a liar's paradox. I am not wearing socks. But what I told you was a lie. It's a liar's paradox. I will stop all the clocks 'cause everything that I say is a lie. What if I told you that I was just sleeping? And what if by sleeping I was keeping you awake? And what if you awoke to find you'd only just been dreaming of a time when all my sleeping was more than you could take? It's a liar's paradox. I am not wearing socks. But what I told you was a lie. It's a liar's paradox. I will stop all the clocks 'cause everything that I say is a lie. What if I cried and said I'd never loved you? And what if I had loved you but you had never even cried? Could lovers like us divide the time that we'd been trying between crying over lies that we had told the other side? It's a liar's paradox. I am not wearing socks. But what I told you was a lie. It's a liar's paradox. I will stop all the clocks 'cause everything that I say is a lie.
15.
Fresh Breath 00:52
16.
Oh my father, I saw you lock the door. Oh my father, you threw an angel across the floor. Oh my father, I am crying outside the glass. Oh my father, we lose our innocence so fast. The garden at dusk is a fine place to be and no one can touch what no one can see. I'll make you a promise that Daddy can't hear. In the garden at dusk we'll lay down our fear. Oh my father, I loved you more than myself. Oh my father, you put me on a shelf. Oh my father, I wish I had your strength. Oh my father, I'd still have gone to any length. The garden at dusk is a fine place to be and no one can touch what no one can see. I'll make you a promise that Daddy can't hear. In the garden at dusk we'll lay down our fear. Oh my father, the house is nearly done. Oh my father, see how my sisters run! Oh my father, I'm ashamed to bring it up. Oh my father, it's hard to live with an empty cup. The garden at dusk is a fine place to be and no one can touch what no one can see. I'll make you a promise that Daddy can't hear. In the garden at dusk we'll lay down our fear. The garden at dusk is a fine-tuned charade. The flowers aren't much more than a bloodied brocade. I'll sing you a sad song for the lost little boy. In the garden at dusk we'll lay down our joy.
17.
I'm done for. I'm bleeding. There's no way out of this mess but to die -- a lost cause conceding that I'll never walk again. Hazy ribbons of my last breath laugh at me from over my head. My skin's cold. I'm shaking. I hear you starting the car in the street. The ceiling is spinning and we'll never talk again. I'll suffocate in these sheets like a corpse that retreats into morning until I am dead. Tell Mom I'm sleeping 'til my heart turns off. There's no more reasons left to turn and cough. Say love is an ocean whose waters will keep me alive. Say love is an ocean. The night time, it drowns me. But that's no secret 'cause day after day my sore eyes get redder and I'll never cry again. Recklessly reeling without you to block me and keep me alive. Tell Mom I'm sleeping 'til my heart turns off. There's no more reasons left to turn and cough. Say love is an ocean whose waters will keep me alive. Say love is an ocean. I'm sorry. I'm broken. There's much better jewelry in your drawer than me. It's okay to wear it 'cause I'll never shine again. A boring story, I know, but the chandelier overhead was one of a kind. Tell Mom I'm sleeping 'til my heart turns off. There's no more reasons left to turn and cough.
18.
When I was young I heard a harp singing sweetly from the clouds for a little bit, and I believed with all my heart that the world believed a little bit, too.

about

The Garden At Dusk is a gorgeous watercolory sketchbook of harmonies, surprisingly spare production, and surreal lyrics that hint at fleeting moments of heartbreak, isolation and redemption. But the entire panoramic sweep of these lo-fi bedroom ballads is undergirded by an undeniable hope for what may come. Highlights are "Older By 4 Years," "This Package," and "'Til My Heart Turns Off."

credits

released October 28, 2014

word and music by Matt Geiler
produced by Matt and Mike Geiler

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Frederick Julius Omaha, Nebraska

Frederick Julius is underground, lo-fi pop music that conjures the vital sound of early Beach Boys records with lyrics that are visual experiments in the surreal. Each title in the ever-growing Frederick Julius catalogue is written and recorded by Matt Geiler in his sleepy bedroom studio, dubbed The Wonder Room, in Los Angeles, CA. ... more

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